When uniqueness unites us as brothers

This article was originally published in Italian in the January edition of operaincerta

‘Are you twins?’ There was a time in my life when my sister and I were mistaken for twins, even though we were different and were three and a half years apart. We found it funny and somehow it made us feel more complicit.

Twins have always fascinated me, especially the apparently identical monozygotic ones. I had the opportunity to ‘study’ them a bit, especially during two years when I was following five pairs of twins aged 4 and 5 at the same time. They lived in the Buckinghamshire area of England. Bizarre, right? Well, maybe not for science and IVF.

Anyway, back to our talk... the part I was most interested in is that even twins that look identical are in fact not identical at all. No one person is perfectly the same as another, and in twins this becomes particularly obvious.

Each one of us is unique among the 8 billion or so on planet earth. From DNA to fingerprints, from our iris and the outward appearance of our ears to the way we walk, every detail of us is unrepeatable. This uniqueness is not only physical, but also emotional: everyone feels and experiences things in a unique way. In fact, when someone says, ‘I understand what you are going through, I have been there myself’, in my opinion this statement, however empathetic, is not entirely true. The way each of us experiences and feels experiences is different. This is also seen, for example, at the scene of a crime where the witnesses never give the exact same version of events.

But it does not end there. Our uniqueness is also mental, in the way we create, think and reason, as well as spiritual - not related to a religion but to a reflection of our true self, our essence. Each of these aspects - physical, emotional, mental and spiritual - creates our unique identity.

But in a world of unique individuals, how can we really feel part of one big family? In my opinion, the answer lies in becoming aware of our uniqueness and embracing it fully, and then being able to do the same for others. Just like the pieces of a jigsaw puzzle, each of us with our unique shapes, we fit together with others finding our place and enhancing each other.

This is the beauty of uniqueness. It allows us to create a mosaic of experiences, emotions and perspectives that enrich us as individuals and as a community, and gives greater meaning to our existence. When we accept this in ourselves, we can accept others as brothers, opening up to a world of collaboration and mutual respect, where each person brings something unique to the table, and creates a harmony greater than the sum of its parts.

In this way, the concept of brothers and sisters goes beyond sharing the same blood. We can find brothers everywhere: in people with whom we share ideals and with whom we disagree, in deep friendships, in our neighbours and in nature itself. To be brothers is to recognise that although we are unique, we are all connected by something greater.

That is why, for me, before talking about inclusion, diversity and brotherhood, we need to understand who we really are. And by the way: we often talk about inclusion. But what does it really mean? Inclusion means the state of belonging to something, to a group. But if we are all unique, inclusion loses meaning because the group would then be made up of as many of us as there are inhabitants of the world, thus having to include everyone, without discriminating against anyone's uniqueness.

Therefore, true brotherhood is born when we celebrate our uniqueness first and foremost instead of fearing or suppressing it, when we choose to respect each other and live authentically. This is how we can build a world where uniqueness becomes our strength, and where the bond between brothers - biological and universal - becomes the foundation of a richer, fuller and more harmonious life.

And you, do you know what makes you unique?